Wow! What a positive response from my latest blog “Does He or She FIT?” Because of the great amount of responses that I received via email etc., I’ve given a great deal of thought about what this week’s message should be about. It seems that people everywhere are searching for the right “FIT”. What do I mean when I say the right “FIT”? Having the right “FIT” means being connected with the man that God put under spiritual anesthesia and removed one of his ribs to create you. When God brings the two of you together something within your soul ought to “leap”. Yes, it’s possible! Having that spiritual connection is the most important thing. Why? Because the physical will fade away!

Well, I want to take it a step further and take a look at what Paul said in the book of Ephesians. As he states in the fifth chapter and twenty-second verse, “Wives, submit yourselves to your own husbands as you do to the Lord.” One of the most controversial terms to women everywhere is the word, SUBMIT! I’m willing to bet that some of you who may be reading this right now are making a face. My prayer is that after reading this blog, whenever you hear or read that passage of scripture again, it will no longer vex your spirit and you will begin to see that submitting is not a bad thing if you are submitting to the one who “FITS.”

Let me first begin by giving you the definition of the word submit in its original Greek text. The word, submit, means to “identify with, to support, to get under, to lift up.” It does NOT mean to elevate one person over another. We shared in the last post “Does He or She FIT” that it was not God’s intention in the beginning, because He chose to make woman from a bone that He removed from man’s side. The husband and wife are supposed to be a partnership; they are supposed to work together. God gave Adam a partner not a slave or servant but someone who would share the responsibility. Here is the reason why I know that God did not intend for man to rule over woman. If you take a close look at the judgments that were pronounced after Adam and Eve sinned, God said to the woman, “your desire will be for your husband and he will rule over you”(Genesis 3:16). Beloved, that was a punishment for the sin; it was not and is not God’s original intention. The good news is that because Jesus died on the cross for our sins, it nullifies what the first Adam did, and thusly, we are no longer bound by those judgments.

Sisters, I want you to recall from my previous post that you were created from the bone. One of the primary functions of the bones is to support, to uphold. Ephesians 5 makes it very clear that men have a need for respect and women have a need for love! According to the amplified Bible it says “Let the wife see that she respects and reverences her husband, that she notices him, honors him, prefers him, and esteems him exceedingly” If she respects him as she should, she shows her love for him. Woman of God, it is okay to tell your man/husband, “I believe in you!” Remember you came from his rib; you are to provide for him inner security and protection. The words that you speak to him are powerful and they affect him greatly. Your words will either bring to him life or death. Calling him names, belittling him, and criticizing him, etc. are not ways to show that you are supportive of your partner/husband. You cannot expect him to love you as Christ loved the church if you don’t support him! I would contend that one of the biggest issues with relationships is not the surface stuff that you argue about, but when two people in a relationship start fulfilling roles that God did not create them to fill. God divinely placed attributes in a husband that He did not place in a wife, and vice versa. You can’t be “the man” while having a man at the same time. If you are in a relationship now and find that things are “out of order” you still have time to get them in order. Sisters, you must stop praying that God will help you to be a good partner/wife and begin to pray that God will make you the partner/wife He needs you to be for your partner/husband. There is a difference! In the first prayer you are just praying to be a good wife, in the second prayer you are asking to be “God’s wife” for your husband.

Lastly, one of the biggest clues we miss when we read this passage in Ephesians, is the fact that Paul was not speaking to the general public. Paul was speaking to those who were a part of the body of Christ. Here is my point: Why are you submitting to someone who knows nothing about the love that Christ has for the church? Understand that your submission is directly connected to his love for you like Christ’s love for the church. He can’t love you like Christ loved the church if he doesn’t personally know about the love of Christ. Thusly, you can’t submit to him. Can I just keep it real for a few more seconds? You’ve read or heard, “What God has joined together, let no man put asunder.” Here is the question: DID GOD JOIN THE TWO OF YOU TOGETHER? You can’t expect God to bless something that He was not a part of, or was not invited to be a part of, in the first place!

Join me next week, as I will continue this discussion on God’s plan for the perfect FIT. I am going to reflect on “IF SHE DOESN’T FIT, YOU MUST QUIT”.

bINpowered,
D.K.Kearney
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